Why not move to Iraq?
 
Funny Military Images #2
 
more at: http://www.tom-phillips.info/jokes_index.html

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The exchange between Churchill and Lady Astor: She said, ‘If you were my husband, I’d give you poison,’ and he said, ‘If you were my wife, I’d take it.’
         
Gladstone, a member of Parliament, to Benjamin Disraeli: ‘Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.’
That depends, sir,’ said Disraeli, ‘On whether [...]

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You’ve been waiting for them with bated breath, so without further ado here are the 2008 Darwin awards.

Eighth Place
In Detroit , a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.
 Seventh Place
A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker, who ‘totally [...]

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pretty dark humor… lol
‘Bring Your Daughter To War’ Day

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1. “Aren’t you afraid that he’ll be killed?”
(This one ranks in at number one on the “duh” list. Of course we’re afraid. We’re terrified. The thought always lingers at the backs of our minds —but thanks brilliant, you just brought it back to the front. Maybe next you can go ask someone with cancer if [...]

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Frank was excited about his new rifle and decided to try bear hunting.  He traveled up to Alaska , spotted a small brown bear and shot it.
Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear.  The black bear said, “That was a very bad mistake.  [...]

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A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into Wal-Mart with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
The Wal-Mart greeter said pleasantly, “Good morning, and welcome to Wal-Mart Nice children you have there. Are they twins?”
The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, “Hell no, they ain’t. The oldest [...]

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‘You know what?’ says the 6 year-old.’I think it’s about time we started cussing.’ The 4 Year-olds nods his head in approval.
The 6 year-old continues, ‘When we go downstairs for breakfast, I’m gonna say something with ‘hell’ and you say something with ‘ass.’ The 4 year-old agrees with enthusiasm.
When their mother walks into the kitchen [...]

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